.::my long journey::.

Mood : confused really. I asked something stupid to my friend. am i really that annoying? she even speechless. i know that every one doesn't like me. in brief. i often seeing than speaking lately. i'm alone and you know, he loves somebody. that girl who is better (in all things) than me. i wish i could forget this feeling soon. and i wish i won't think of him frequently. i have lotsa wishes. one is, to graduate soon from high school ,continue my life to college. but i'm afraid to experience something new like working. i don't want to go out from my safe zone. even to wish for a rich, yet handsome, guy. wkwk. that's what the teacher told us.

you also can read my review here Title : Infinitely Yours Writer : Orizuka Publisher : GagasMedia Pages : 304 pages Price : Rp47000 Rate : 5/5 stars Reviewer comment : I'm in love with this book. <3 my favorite for this year. I wrote it in Indonesian because the book is Indonesian edition :) Semua hal berawal dari kebetulan.   Rayan, Narayan Sadewa, sangat benci Korea, namun ia tetap harus pergi ke Korea karena ia harus menemui seseorang, mantan kekasih yang meninggalkannya setelah 10 tahun pacaran untuk mengambil beasiswa S2 di Korea. Seharusnya Rayan membeli tiket pulang pergi ke Korea, tetapi Alif, sahabatnya, malah salah membeli tiket tour Korea untuknya.   Jingga, ia amat menyukai Korea, segala berbau Korea dan ia mengikuti tour Korea yang sudah pernah ia ikuti tahun sebelumnya demi menemui pangeran berkudanya, seorang pria Korea yang menjadi native guide di tour yang pernah ia ikuti, Yun Jae.   Pertemuan keduanya dimulai ketika Rayan tidak sengaj...

Mood : feel sorry Listen to : Brown Eyed Girls - Sixth Sense well, I felt sorry to my friends. really, i didn't mean it. i didn't mean to say that to show off or in a sarcasm way. just want to say it. sometimes, i know that my mouth act first than my head. i'm really sorry. wish she read this post. >.< and I know that lately i'm being so annoying. to be talkative. and i'm trying to be a quiet person. hope they won't hate me again. aaaa. life is so difficult lately. :( i always wish for simple thing, but why God haven't made it come true? it's simple, i want everybody be friend with me. i wish i didn't hurt them from my words or else. aaaaaaaaa. i don't know i don't know. :((

Happy Birthday to me~ Holaaaa. Today is special. It's my birthday~ hohoo. I'm 17th nowww~ Well, I don't celebrate it so I just celebrate it in my blog.~ hehehe well, I never think that time would pass so fast till I got 17 now. :D So many well. hehehe but really, everyone forget about my birthday. even my family :( *sad* but it's okay~ I'll celebrate it by myself. hoho. but thanks to Ray-Uki-Senpai and Ce Sinchan for the congratulations. Hoho and thanks to God for giving me such a long time to live (buat umur yang panjang sampai skarang). I'm very grateful now. :) you know what? today , many people have their birthday. haha. Well, Happy Birthday to you who celebrate it today :D Let's have party! Except, to realize, that today is my birthday, today is as usual, having breakfast, go to temple (?) to pray, finishing homework. duhhh. boring! I checked again my photos CD. arghhhh. that photographer must be changed unless he really wanted to be fi...

Mood : baddddddddddddddd Listen to : Gumiho's Theme -Fox Rain- My Girlfriend is Gumiho OST Tahukah Anda bahwa kebenaran itu lebih menyakitkan daripada kebohongan? Oke, saya lebih suka kebenaran yg pahit daripada kebohongan yg manis, karena ujung-ujungnya sama-sama menjadi pahit juga. Jadi lebih baik mengecap pahit itu terlebih dahulu, lalu memprosesnya dan beradaptasi dengan rasa pahit itu daripada dikejutkan dari rasa manis ke rasa pahit! Ya! Saya mendapat berita ga mengenakkan dari adik saya. Teman adik saya ini mengatai adik saya tapi make ngatain saya juga. Apa reaksi Anda ketika mendengar ini? Adik saya marah-marah sama temannya (yang untungnya cowo, tapi cukup nyenyes) karena mengatakan hal yg ga ada benernya. Tapi, temennya ini membela diri bahwa ia mendengar dari seorang teman saya yang mengatakan bahwa saya itu nyenyes, cerewet, dsb. Ya ampun, saya ga menyangka bahwa teman saya (yg saya anggap teman baik) mengatakan hal demikian di hadapan orang lain tetapi tidak to ...

Hujan tak kunjung datang meninggalkan jejak debu sepanjang jalan Hujan tak kunjung datang di tengah kegersangan hati akankah ada mata air? Hujan tak kunjung datang mengingat terik matahari tak kunjung mereda Hujan tak kunjung datang Apa aku masih harus terus menanti?

Mood : Laughing Out Loud! hahahaha. gila. saya uda gila akut. Makin lihai saja saya dalam meramu kata2 menjadi kata yg GOMBAL! wkwk. @ jes_chan   oh,, aq kn tersesat di hatimu, makanya aq gk keliatan.. lho??! haha :p @ thaEthaa   hahaha. masa sih? padahal di hatiku ga ada lorong2. hanya ada 1 jalan menuju hatiku, dan itu buat kamu seorang.   # eleee saya sangat terkejut dengan apa yg saya ketikkan ke teman saya (look at the largest one). apa saya berbakat jadi seorang penulis puisi ntar? apakah saya juga berbakat sebagai penggombal sejati? hahaha. kita lihat saja nanti! LOL

Mencintai kamu seperti bernapas sulit rasanya tuk berhenti* Mencintai kamu dengan segenap kesalahanku karena denganmu, semua terasa benar* Mencintai kamu takkan sesulit ini jika cintamu belum terbagi kepada yang lain Mencintai kamu bagai air kadang tenang, kadang beriak membuatku bimbang Mencintai kamu dengan segenap hatiku agar kau pun mencintaiku dengan segenap hatimu PS : * inspired by Andrei Aksana - Mencintaimu Pagi, Siang, Malam. but I don't copy it originally, I just remember bagaimana kata2 dalam bukunya saja. Sisa puisinya? saya sambung2 saja pakai imajinasi sendiri. hehehe.

Kau tahu apa yang paling kutakutkan? Jatuh cinta Jika aku jatuh cinta, aku takkan pernah bisa bangun dan aku takut kau takkan pernah menolongku yang pada akhirnya aku semakin lemas tak berdaya luka yang telah tertoreh dan semakin lemas aku berakhir dengan kekosongan hingga akhirnya aku takut tuk mengisinya lagi karena hanya akan kembali menjadi kosong

Mood : boredddd :(( Listen to : Selena Gomez - Tell Me Something I Don't Know (yeah, I even don't know what's going on now) It has been a long time since I made this kind of journal. it has reached 39 journal that actually I supposed to write it every day but I just made it when I can. so here I am in this odd number say "it has been a long time" yeah. last Saturday (11/19) I watched SEA GAMES 2011 - Synchronized swimming in Jakabaring Aquatic Stadium. It was hot and nothing we can do except looking for a seat and ya know, we're all in time, because it'd be started at 12.00 a.m, and we arrived at 10 a.m. yeah, but the stadium was full before the match had started. and we were out at 12 a.m (when the match started), but we waited for regretfulness. we didn't know that our bus would leave us alone and we waited for 4 hours to get back home. well, it seemed that the bus came but we all refused because we had called our parents to pick us up and we couldn...

Mood : broken heart. (?) (kinda) Listen to : it's shuffle! 양요섭 - 그 사람을 아껴요 aaa. the song is really... make me feel sad. uhhh. I know that I can't cry, I don't know why. Today has proved what I have waited for. aaa. I know. I know. aku pikir orang patah hati itu bakal nangis-nangis. tapi kenapa saya tidak? apa saya tidak menyukai dia? mungkin ya, mungkin tidak. ahhh. anggap saja lewat. consider him as friend. as classmate. dan saya juga nyadar kok, kalau saya memang bukan tipe cewe cantik yg akan dilihat cowo seperti dia, dan saya tahu gadisnya itu memang lebih dari saya (walaupun saya masih lebih baik dalam urusan pelajaran) *bangga sdikit dong* hehehe. garing banget ya saya. mungkin sebaiknya saya tidak banyak berharap karena seperti yg dikatakan terkadang harapan itu melambungkanmu hingga ke angkasa, melayang tapi hidup menghempaskanmu bagai gravitasi , memaksamu jatuh dan merasakan sakit. jadi sebaiknya saya berhenti berharap untuk sesuatu yg saya tahu tidak mungkin bagi...

Mood : galauuuu Listen to : SNSD/Girls' Generation-The Boys wow, blogger has new color. it's blue! aaa. I want to tell sth about the night before. duh, why did I dream about him? I think, I just consider him as a classmate. but now, I don't know how to act while he also sits beside my friend!! I can't act normally/naturally, or whatever, and I'm afraid to lose words when I'm with him. and this thing came. one of the girls said that "aaa, kau ni, kasih ke dia, ke dia, ke dia (aku)". oh no. aku langsung menyangkal bgtu saja, and I can't see his face. but I think he has no feeling to me or others, but I don't know about the others. this guy is just too hideous (?). I even can't read what he thought about. yaaa. tomorrow have history test. wish me luck. and saturday , everyone said that we're gonna watch SEA GAMES at Jakabaring, Palembang. uhhh, the transport, so sure, is too expensive. even the tickets, we don't know how much it cost. ...

hmm. actually I really want to make some review books in this blog. but unfortunately , I think as my previous review about movie (which doesn't long last at all), I will make some if I really want. ciaossu. sacchan PS : what the h*ll is writing task? I even don't have anything to share in 15o words more about advertisements production since I haven't worked yet! PS 2 : yes!!! the history test was canceled! it's changed to this Friday. at least my burden become less than before. :) and yeah, tomorrow will have computer practical test. wish me luck! *I always ask people to wish me luck . duhhh*

Mood : fiuhhhh~ Listen to : I forget what song I just sang! yeah, you know! I got this feeling just a few minutes ago, before I pressed that button "post"! ugggghhhh, I feel release *?*. something like that. hahaha oh nooooo, this week is HELL! got a test every day in every subject. just what the h*ll is that! I can't read those books of mine , just delivered on my hand... >.< but I have to wait till next week, at the SEA GAMES closing ceremony (we have 2 days holiday for it) and I can read them. I'll keep them till the time. I'll get what I've been waiting for if I wait patiently. >.< yeah yeah, don't remind me! I have lotsa assignment to do so I should off right now. though I really want to online for moreeeee longgggg time . hihihi... and guess what (What??!! you should off!) I'll face my semester exam in this 2 weeks. wish me luck! on Dec 5! :(())

Mood : Happy~ Listen to : Maaya Sakamoto-Triangular yeay~ lately I'm so happy since last time I watched 'Lie to Me' which was starred by Yoon Eun Hye! well, I love her acting and in this film, her acting is good. I like it but it seems to much look like Princess Hours, which she played as the main actress in it, and the role is kinda same. use necklace or ring to accept the proposal. I think the director seems influent by Princess Hours :| but still. I love her acting. I felt emotionally when watching the drama. aaaa. I really wanna work in tourism! andddd. finally, it's SEA GAMES! we will have holiday for 3 days, but it's okay! it's more than enough! at least I could rest and relax, forget about the assignment because I'll finish it all tonight! so I could sleep along the day~ :D oh heaven~ oh, I have planned what I'm gonna do in holiday. maybe karaoke *this one, I was just asked by my friends, but they doesn't know if the road will be blocked or no...

Mood : desperately. Listen to : the sound of my computer. hnggggg...~ yaa. sometimes what we need is time. but just regret it that we just have 24 hours that most of them we use it for school more than 12 hours and sleep for just 8 hours. duhh. i don't think the rest of it I could use it to finish those tasks. and yeahh, I need longer time to think over my decision. everything becomes so unstable. i don't know what path should I take. i wanna take psychology, but realize I wanna take hospitality, and suddenly change to tourism. i think tourism has everything what I want. history, meeting people, language, culture, and else. but, my mom still not sure. ah, I think I should take what my mom wanted. she really wants me to take accounting or business, but I don't want to. It's really boring when I took economic and accounting for 3 years and should learn it for 3 years more? No way! that will be dead boring! so I want to try something new! jika jurusan itu ada, walaupun sed...