hello again and some stories from before

I have been on and off on this blog post. Sometimes, I forgot that I have a blog and that I can write whatever I want in this blog, without the need to post a picture first before putting on a caption.

been thinking about relationship and if I really want to get into a relationship.

and how my life now is so uncertain.

I was doubting myself, being a person who has low self esteem. I wonder if I can get what I want at the end.

I hope everything will turn out to be great. or fine. whatever is that, I hope it's gonna be good.

I wish my wish would come true. I am still working towards it. I know others do not have it easy, but I am so impatient. I guess God is still trying to open my eyes, to make me a patient person, but I just can't, though I am trying now. I think I am better now than my previous self.

I was really a bad person before. How I made my parents worried about me, felt all the frustration I had. I would rather them not to know my frustration now. I just wish them to feel happy, without worrying so much about me. duh, i feel like crying writing this. I love them so much and I just can't express myself.

When I was asked by my friend today about my vision of future, I envision myself to be a successful woman, working in an advanced country, had a Master's degree, having a great business. Retired to countryside and grow plants or taking care of lambs and alpacas.

life has a lot of surprises, but I hope what I envision will become my surprise at the end.

Cheers :)